Advice on Dating and Choosing a Prom Date

“I think traditionally, every girl dreams about having a guy ask her to prom just like in the movies... but in real life sometimes girls have to be bolder than the guys. Some guys are intimidated by us gals, and really want to ask us out, but don't know how. I think asking a guy is perfectly alright, as long as you feel confident ...and just remember, if he says no, a pack of girls can sometimes be just as fun as a boy/girl date.”

“The best way to turn someone down is to thank them for their offer, then tell them that unfortunately someone got to you first. And tell them that you'll see them there and save a dance for them. Even if you have no intention of dancing with this person, it's still a nice gesture. Just be gracious. I always think to myself, wow, I made an impression on this person enough for them to dig up the courage to ask me out.”

How to Talk to Boys

For those of you who have no problem talking to boys or getting boys to talk to you for that matter, read this. It never hurts to brush up on your communication skills. You might just learn how to catch that perfect boy who has been mysteriously unobtainable.

So you're nervous about talking to this guy (that's completely understandable). You would really like him to ask you to the prom, but first you have to get him to notice you. Then you have to get him to talk to you.

First off, don't stare. That could creep him out! If you're lucky a simple smile could work. Then if he comes over; you're halfway there. Uh-oh! You panic! You can't think of anything to say. You have to talk! Here are some Ice breakers…

Dating: Be Flirtatious

(But only if that’s in your nature)

  • “I couldn't help but notice you drooling over me”
  • “Would you like to take me out sometime, like prom night?”

Or Be Funny and Flirtatious

  • ”Your name must be Visa; because you're everywhere I want to be.”
  • "I seem to have lost my phone number; may I have yours?"
  • "I'm new in town; May I have directions to your house?"
  • "There must be something wrong with my eyes; I can't take them off of you."
  • "Are you from Tennessee? Cause you're the only ten I see"
  • "May I borrow a quarter? - I'd like to call my mom and tell her I just met the guy of my dreams."
  • "You must be tired; you've been running through my mind all day."
  • "If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together."
  • "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"
  • "Are you a surgeon? Cause you took my heart away!"
  • "Do you have a band-aid? I scraped my knee when I fell for you."
  • "Look at his shirt label and when he asks what you are doing say, "I'm checking to see if you were made in heaven."
  • "Is it hot in here or is it just you?"
  • "If I pet you would you follow me home?"

Advice About How to Get His Attention

Now that you have his attention, you'll have to make conversation. You also want to get to know him. Okay he's cute, but do you have anything in common? Is he good to you? Find out! Ask him some questions. Ask him something about him, sports, clothes, art, movies, music, current affairs, even school. Don't start off the conversation talking about you. While I'm sure you're very interesting, you want to know about him, don't you?

Remember: even the coolest guys feel insecure about approaching girls; Not to mention asking them out.

Dating: Other Schools

The Prom Date from Another Planet

If there isn't anybody in your school you want to ask to the prom, or want to ask you, you may be luckier than you think. Look at your love-struck friends whose grades and performance are suffering because they can't go to their third period class without touching base with lover boy at his locker.

Still, if you feel uncomfortable about going date less: solution! Talk to a cousin, aunt or another family member who doesn't live too near you, and let them know that you are in the market for a prom date. Talk to someone from another neighborhood preferably from another school district. You won't believe how many available dates come out of the woodwork! Aunt Edna will know the cutest boy!

Advantages of Interplanetary Dating

I know, I know, you feel a little on the edge because your date is from the great unknown. You've heard the expression "always look on the bright side"? Here are some of those sides…

1. You don't have the fear of rejection! Nobody but your best friend, sister, cousin, mom, Aunt Edna or whoever fixed you up knows you're even fishing in another pond. So if he blows you off, you won't have to hear about it in school on Monday. He's not from your school or even your world.

2. You can dump him after the prom. You can just go back to your own planet and forget you ever met him. When you're friends ask whatever happened too... you can just tell them the truth; you dumped him. If he dumped you, you can tell them that too. People often say, I dumped him, even if it was the other way around. Steer clear of lying, if you are embarrassed to say you were dumped, just tell them you broke up, or it didn't work. If you get a rep for telling lies, no one will want to believe you about anything. Besides, some people will believe what they want anyhow.

3. There is a certain amount of intrigue and appeal to having a mystery date! You may develop a completely different aura and become more interesting to your classmates!

How to Turn a Dude Down

Uh, oh! Mr. Not-So-Right has just worked up the courage to ask you to the Prom. Don't panic. It’s not as bad as you think. Try these simple rules to stay cool, and to let him still think you're all that!

Do Be honest. Tell him you're flattered and you're glad he thought of you. Then explain your situation. "I already promised my friends we'd all go together," or "There’s someone else I was planning to ask.”

Don't dangle the carrot in front of him. Saying maybe is the ultimate in bad manners. If he’s a suitable second choice, then you should ask choice #1, to insure Mr. Almost-Right doesn’t have time to find another date if #1 falls through. Then you can be the decision maker.

Don't Lie. Claiming you’re skipping the prom will come back to bite you. He’ll see you there and you’ll look like a total jerk, and feel even worse!

Do consider his feelings. Treat him with respect and be genuine when you see him in the halls. He’ll come out of it with a not- so bruised ego, and you’ll have one more admirer in the world.

Dating Crises and Suggested Solutions

What’s the worst that can happen?

Dilemma #1: Date doesn’t dance.

Everything is perfect. You (of course) look fabulous, the music is superb, the lights are low, and the perfect song comes on. Problem! Your date won’t get out on the floor.

Solution: Don’t freak out, he might not know how to dance.

Start him out slow! Begin with a few slow dances, and gradually work him up to faster dances. If he still refuses, just go have fun. Dance with your girl friends.

Dilemma #2: Date can’t keep his hands off of you.

All evening your date lavishes a lot of attention to you. You totally eat up. But after the partying, he still won’t lay off. It gets a little creepy, and he needs to back off.

Solution: Well… you do look great, but this is no reason for him loose respect for you (or control). Just talk to him. He may just be caught up in the whole romance of the evening. Try not to make a scene, but if he still won’t back off, make as much of a scene as necessary.

Dilemma #3: Date hates his picture taken.

Your date arrives at your house and everyone is ready for picture taking. You go to that perfect little picture spot, and show your beautiful smile. Then you look up to see your date with no expression on his face. What to do, what to do?

Solution: Try to loosen your date up, tickle him, or push him in jest. If this doesn’t work, just ask him to smile and act like he wants to go to prom. If all else fails, give him the puppy dog lip and eyes. That always works!

Dilemma #4: Date dances with another girl.

Your guy likes to dance so much that when your feet get tired, and you need a rest he keeps going like the “energizer bunny”. When you sit down and realize he is not following you, you look for him only to find he is dancing with someone else!

Solution: What would you do in his situation? If she is a friend of his, try to be understanding. He is just having fun. But if she is some random girl, or one of those girls that you just can’t stand, get back onto those aching feet and cut in. Don’t be rude about it, but make it obvious that he is yours.

Dilemma #5: Date’s tux doesn’t fit.

Its 24 hours before the big day, and your date goes to pick up his tux. Like a good boy, he tries it on when he gets to the shop. They ordered him the wrong sizes, and everything is way too tight!

Solution: Usually it is just a mix up of orders, and someone else’s tux will be too big, but if the shop isn’t able to do anything about it, try going to another shop if this doesn't work, see if anyone you know has one he can wear. Or, you might be able to buy one. Check out the local department store. Even some thrift shops have inexpensive tuxedos.

More Dating Crises and Suggested Solutions

What else could possibly happen?

Dilemma #6: Your date doesn’t show.

So you are all ready and waiting for your date to arrive. And waiting, and waiting, and waiting…

Solution: The first thing you should do is try calling his house. If nobody answers or you don’t know his number, call up some of your friends that are going to prom. Ask if you can hitch a ride with them, and try to enjoy yourself as best you can. Believe me, there may be a million reasons he didn’t show, and you can deal with that later! Leave word for him if he shows at your house, and go to the prom anyway.

Dilemma #7: Your date leaves during the prom.

You take a minute to fix your make-up and hair in the ladies room and when you return, your friends inform you that your date left with his buds to start the partying early.

Solution: Don’t take it personally! If a guy can do this on one of the most special nights of your life, then he is a real creep! Just finish the night off and have fun without him. Your friends will be there to bad mouth him, and cheer you up. Be glad you found out now, before anything serious developed.

Dilemma #8: Your date is bored and wants to leave.

Your date doesn’t seem to be into this whole prom thing. He’s had that “is it over yet,” look on his face all night. When you try to talk to him, he tells you how bored he is, and asks you if you want to leave.

Solution: Tell him how important the night is to you. If he doesn’t understand or just keeps complaining, let him go home. He’s not worth your time if he can’t sacrifice a little boredom for your sake.

Dilemma #9: Your date picks out the gaudiest outfit on Earth.

You didn’t have time to go with your date to pick out his tux, but you did tell him not to clash with your dress. Well he shows up and it doesn’t matter what dress you would have chosen; He clashes with everything!

Solution: Well…it’s his prom too. Okay, so it was inconsiderate of him to get such a flashy outfit, but what can you do? It’s already time to go. Just go and have fun. Whatever you do, don’t cry and ruin the make-up that took forever to put on. Who knows, this may put you in the yearbook a bunch of times. At the very least his tux will be a topic of conversation.

Dilemma #10: Oops! Your date is shorter than you when you wear heels.

After pondering over whom the perfect prom date would be, you choose one. And the winner is___________(fill in the blank with prom date). He’s funny, smart, sweet, and…short!

Solution: Don’t ever let any bit of vanity get in your way. Beauty is only skin deep. Just don’t let this problem get any worse, buy flats. If anyone dares say anything, don’t hurt his feelings. Just smile, and say “he’s perfect,” and continue with your perfect evening.